I grew up in a very loving Christian home, but I really never grasped the meaning of the religion that my family followed. I attended church and Sunday school because that was what was expected of me. I quickly learned how to pretend that I understood their faith, but it had no meaning for me.
When I left for college I was free to do as I chose. I turned my back on the religion that my family had shown me and lived a life ignoring God. I got wrapped up in philosophies of humanism and evolution and found it very easy to convince myself that God didn't exist, that He was just a convenient explanation used by people who didn't want to try hard enough to find real answers. As the years went by, I found myself not even being able to remember what I had been told about God.
I met the woman who was to become my wife while in college. She also felt just as I did about religion and that made us very comfortable together. We lived together for almost two years, then got married. Our wedding was in the church I had attended as a child, but only because I knew my mother would expect us to get married in a church. God had no part in our marriage. We were happy to go our own way.
After the initial joy wore off, we found our lives to be empty and we drifted apart. One year after our marriage, we were divorced. Of course, I didn't realize at the time what we were lacking. I ended up living in a nearby city because some close friends of mine found an apartment for me near where they lived. I recovered from the divorce and even found myself happy living alone. I spent lots of time with my friends and enjoyed life. But still, something was missing.
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